Scary Night

Last night was one of the scariest experiences of my life.  In reality, it wasn't too serious, but I felt like my greatest fear was becoming a reality - that something would happen to my kids and I wouldn't be able to do anything about it.  Anyone that has spent a lot of time with me and my girls knows I am a typical mom:  I am always trying to prevent a disaster that is unlikely to happen.  Whether it is falling down stairs, getting hit by a car, choking, burning themselves, etc., I just never want to see them go through anything painful or traumatic.  And I don't know what I would do if I lost either one of them.

Well, last night I was changing Ashley's diaper while Christian changed Elysha.  I was slightly distracted because Christian got up to get a diaper and Elysha peed on our carpet (saying "oh no!"), so I wasn't looking at Ashley at the time.  She started screaming and panicking.  I looked over and she just had a look of terror on her face.  I picked her up and she went limp in my arms.  I had no idea if she was throwing a fit or if something was really wrong or what could have happened.  She never acts like that.

I layed her back down and she got really rigid and she stopped breathing for a few seconds - long enough for her lips to turn blue.  I didn't know what to do and I just sat there staring at her and asking Christian what was wrong.  He picked her up and took her out into the cold and she started breathing again and was just really pale and quiet.  It all took probably 40 seconds.  It was terrifying though, I didn't even know if something really awful happened, we just didn't expect it or know what happened. 

I called the emergency room and they basically said they wouldn't know what happened unless they looked at her, and it might not have been serious.  I didn't know if maybe we should take her in, but they didn't encourage it.  I was panicked and Christian was just calm headed and in control.  He gave Ashley a blessing and I got very emotional as I was reminded again that Heavenly Father is in control of all things that happen in our lives.  I know that if we are righteous, that he will ensure that what happens to us is the best thing for us.  Even if I don't understand something, I know that I need to "trust in the Lord with all my heart, and lean not unto my own understanding".

Christian ended up taking Ashley to see his uncle, who is a doctor here in Ephraim.  He said she probably had a mild seizure and that it is actually somewhat common for otherwise healthy children to have seizures without any known cause.  His son actually had small seizures when he was growing up.  I was comforted that it's not as dangerous and scary as it felt like it should be.  At the same time, it is driving me crazy that there is nothing I can do to prevent it.  Hopefully it was just a one time occurance. 

So basically, everything is OK and we shouldn't be worried about it unless it happens again.  However, this experience has made me think a lot of how much I take my children's health for granted.  They are so little and fragile, yet so full of life and strong.  I am so grateful that they are able to be healthy and experience their life to the fullest.  I am so grateful that I have them in my life and that I can hug them and kiss them and play with them whenever I want.  I don't want to ever take them for granted, we have been so blessed!

Happy Thanksgiving

It's been awhile!  I finally got some pictures, so I thought I would post some and update everyone on life as of lately.

Elysha has really gotten a lot of personality in the last few months.  She has become a little mother to Ashley, it's almost like she knows she is two minutes older.  She will pat Ashley's back when she cries and ask her to sit on her lap.  She also loves to clip Ashley's toenails and brush her teeth for her.  It is so fun to watch, she is just naturally very sweet! 

I'm also seeing a lot of the Brady personality in Elysha.  She loves to tease Ashley, her dad and me.  She will ask for a hug or a kiss and then turn her head away and the last minute and just laugh.  She also loves to steal Ashley's blanket and sit on it.  She has a fun sense of humor and can always make us smile, and she keeps herself VERY busy. 

Elysha has been sick with one thing after another for the past month!  The poor girl.  She has mild croupe right now.  And she is getting four molars in at once.  I hope she can get healthy again soon.

Ashley is just a little sweetheart.  She also loves to make people smile and laugh.  She has a lot of her dad's personality - usually happy and content with her life.  She is very observant - she will just sit and watch people - and she learns really quick. 

She likes to "help" me with the housework.  She will pick things up (she usually will dump something out first so she has something to pick up), wash the walls (after she writes on them with crayons), put clothes into the washer and dryer and take all of her clean clothes out of her drawers so she has room to 'fold' and put her dirty clothes in there.  She keeps me busy! 

But I can't believe how much she loves to learn - she is talking a lot now, she can do the actions for Patty Cake and Once there Was a Snowman, and she even knows how to call her dad on the phone.  I just love her smile and her sweet spirit.  She has a lot to teach me.

This pregnancy has gone by really fast!  I can't believe I'm only 10 weeks away.  Our baby is moving lots and lots, I'm not used to all the flips and kicks because Ashley and Elysha didn't have that much room to move.  I love to feel him moving around.  I'm feeling a lot better and I'm generally not as tired or dizzy as I was there for awhile.  It is nice to get a bit of life back in me because I have so much to get ready for.  I keep having dreams that I have him and we don't have anywhere to put him or anything ready!  I'm also finishing up Christmas presents right now, so we are pretty busy here. 

I'm basically getting really fat these days.  Ashley and Elysha love to watch 'the Santa Clause', and we have already watched it a few times this year.  The other day it was on and I just felt like I knew exactly how Scott Calvin felt as he quickly transformed into Santa Clause.  Sometimes I forget I'm pregnant and I will knock stuff over with my stomach.  Other times, the girls will come up and rub my stomach and say "oh no!" like they think I got hurt.  Ha, it's just fun.

Well, Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!  I just want to say that I am so grateful for my family, my wonderful husband, my parents, my siblings, my in-laws... I can't believe how blessed I am to have such wonderful family and friends that are loving and supportive of me and such good examples and friends to my kids!  Thank you everyone for all you have done for us! 

I'm Sorry!

So, yesterday the girls were playing in their room.  One of their favorite games is to climb under their beds and play like it's their own little fort.  Hence, I am making a felt playhouse for Christmas with a roof that should be a little taller than it is underneath their cribs.  The one below is just a cute example I saw on another blog. 

We are going to do a farm house with an apple tree they can pick apples from, a horse they can saddle, chickens, a dog, a kitchen inside, a cow they can milk, and a little nursery for them to play with their babies while I play with my new one in February.  (Thank you Marcie for the ideas! :)  I was planning on making it about 4' X 4', but Christian wants me to spoil our children and make one 6' X 4' with a pitched roof and everything!  I'm excited to get started! 

So anyway, they were playing in their make-shift fort yesterday when I heard Ashley scream bloody murder.  I ran in there and pulled her out from under the crib and looked frantically for blood.  I spotted DEEP bite marks in her arm.  No wonder she was crying! 

I looked over at Elysha, who had an astonished look on her face.  I took her arm and told her, very seriously, that she could not bite, that she had hurt Ashley.  All the sudden, she burst into tears.  She climbed onto my lap with Ashley and they both bawled into my shoulder for a good ten minutes.  I just sat and rubbed their backs and told them it was okay and tried not to smile a little. 

Finally, Ashley climbed off my lap and grabbed her blanket and just lay on her stomach, flashing her hurt face at Elysha.  Elysha stopped crying and stared at Ashley with her guilty face.  I asked Elysha "would you like to tell Ashley you are sorry?"  She said "ya" and climbed off my lap. 

She knelt next to Ashley and started rubbing her back.  She brought her face down to the floor and looked her in the eyes, still rubbing her back, and started rambling.  I don't know what she was saying, I just heard the words "Ah - Eee (Ashley)"  and  "Oh- ay  (okay)".  

It made everything better, and Ashley started smiling.  She went to get up, but Elysha held her down and kept talking and rubbing her back.  She was giving quite the speech!  I let Ashley get up and they climbed back under their fort and started playing again.  I only pray they can always give that sincere of an apology and forgive each other that quickly through the rest of their lives! 

PS I apologize for the lack of recent pictures!  My computer won't read my memory card anymore for some reason, so I'm going to have to get a cord for my camera to transfer pictures over.  I will post pictures as soon as I can!

Personality

I just have to write a quick dedication to the girls budding personalities.  They are changing so fast and getting so much spunk.  Elysha likes to head bang to Disney songs, hide under blankets, escape into rooms and shut the door, and she loves to swing.  Ashley loves to tear things into pieces, play hide and seek around corners, play patty cake and be chased by anyone.  My current fascination with their personalities comes up during our bedtime routine.  Elysha hates being left in her crib, as does Ashley, they just deal with it in completely different ways.

When I put Elysha to bed and walk out of the room, she tried to make as much noise as possible.  I don't mean crying, I mean banging her feet against the side of her crib.  She knows that if I hear a noise, I will come in to make sure she didn't fall down or hit her head or something like that.  Therefore, I have started to notice a dull thudding noise followed by a delayed "AHhh!  Momma!"

Ashley takes advantage of these situations as well.  Usually, she will shriek or giggle when I come into the room.  She has also learned that if she entertains me while I am in there, it is harder for me to leave.  The best moment, however, was last night. 

Elysha hit the side of her crib, and I came in to make sure she was ok.  When I could tell all was well, I looked over at Ashley, who was being unusually quiet.  There she was, sitting with an open-mouthed grin on her face, staring at me.  It was the biggest, most faked smile I have ever seen- she looked like the chestier cat.  Then she did something I have never seen her do, she raised her eyebrows at me!  I thought it was the funniest thing I burst out into silent laughter.

Christian jumped of the couch and started running down the hall.  He thought I was crying because I was laughing so hard and trying not to make any noise.  He thought maybe one of them was really hurt.  When he looked over and saw Ashley's animated grin, he just chuckled and turned away.  After that, every time I have looked at her in her crib, she will put her huge fake smile on and raise her eyebrows, like she is the funniest thing ever to crawl the planet. 

2nd Anniversary

I was so excited to celebrate this years anniversary.  I knew that we wouldn't be able to do much because Christian's family was vacationing in Hawaii (yes, on our anniversary :), but I thought I would make him the best dinner ever and we could spend a few hours together that evening gazing into eachothers eyes or something like that. 

I decided to include Christians remaining siblings in our dinner because they didn't have a lot of time to cook either.  It would be really fun to all spend some relaxing time together after a crazy week! 

I spent several days planning out this dinner.  I decided to have bbq ribs because we never eat bbq ribs, and I spent hours searching for the perfect recipe that I could make.  I also googled a perfect twice baked potato recipe and spent hours the night before making a delicious white chocolate raspberry cheesecake from scratch in a springfoam pan and everything.  I was thorough!  I even bought real parmesan cheese for the asparagus.  It would be a night worthy of our anniversary, I was sure.  I mean, what could go wrong?

Well, Ashley, Elysha and I had been visiting family for the week while Christian worked crazy hours.  We got back Saturday morning, and almost immediately went over to Christian's family's house.  Ashley has a really hard time with change at this point in her little life.  She likes her consistency and was very onery by the time we got there.  I'm talking tantrums and throwing things.  I have never seen her like this before!  Elysha was a little frightened.  Nevertheless, I wasn't going to let this stop me.  I cooked and tried to play and entertain and let them sleep as much as they wanted.  By the time I was ready to start cooking the ribs, I was just ready for it all to be over.

Abigail, my sister in law, helped me figure out how to start the grill.  I placed the meat on the grill and went inside for a moment to help change diapers and check on the potatoes.  Four minutes later I opened the door to a cloud of smoke.  All of the ribs had caught fire.  Shad, my 10 year old brother in law, asked me if this was normal?

We extinguished the fire and Christian arrived.  I asked him if he would rather me order a pizza?  But everyone claimed they would much rather have these ribs than pizza.  Shad had never tried ribs before, and he was so excited for the new experience.  I begged him not to base his opinion of ribs off of tonight. 

I had been feeling sick for a short while, but I thought it was just pregnancy.  However, I soon found out I had the flu.  A few minutes later, I also realized I had entirely forgotten about our perfect twice baked potatoes. 

Everyone sat at the table eating bones covered in charcoal and crispy potatoes.  Despite their great attitudes and gratitude, I laid on the couch and vowed never to put that much effort into a dinner again!  No one dared to venture to the cheesecake, so it sat uneaten in the fridge. 

John, my brother in law, thanked me and offered to clean up, which I gratefully accepted.  Then he and Christian were off to the farm on some emergency pipe line problem.  I laid on the couch and tried to figure out what to do.  I was more sick than I can ever remember being before.  Throughout that evening, I lost 5 pounds.  I think it was a mix of pregnancy and just a normal flu.  Needless to say, I was exhausted and not in the mood to chase my girls around or run to save them from falling down the stairs (which I did).  By the time we got home 2 hours later, I was in tears.

After the initial shock reaction to me being upset, Christian was able to help me calm down and we talked about our week and everything that had happened for hours.  I decided it may have been the craziest and (hopefully) worst anniversary we will ever have, but at least we have every day to spend together and make up for it. 

Confessions of a Twin Mom

1. Sometimes I go to Walmart just so I can see / talk to someone that isn't 1 year old.
2. When I am talking to people who aren't 1 year olds, I have a hard time not playing peek-a-boo or making strange noises to surprise them.
3. There has been the seldom (ha) occasion that I have let my girls eat off of the floor, simply because I don't have time to pick them up and put them in the living room and sweep the floor before they come back and start eating dirt out of my pile instead of food.
4. Yes, they have eaten dirt.
5. Ashley puts her finger in her nose like most babies suck their thumbs.  Sometimes I tape her fingers together to make her stop.
6. I get bored if they take naps for longer than 2 hours.  Once, I puposely turned up the radio a little bit louder in hopes they would wake up, just so I could have some entertainment again.
7. I already have nightmares about taking them to kindergarten and having to let them grow up.
8. We waste an incredible amount of food at our house.  1/3 goes into their mouth, 1/3 gets smeared into their hair and clothes, 1/3 gets thrown at each other or on the floor.
9. My house is a walking disaster zone.  I clean it several times a day, but somehow it always ends up looking like no one has clean it in days.
10. I am in for a lot more fun because... I'M PREGNANT!

I'm Not Fond of Fondant

Ashley and Elysha's birthday party is coming up on Sunday.  I thought, since I am going to have a lot to do Saturday, that maybe I would make the cake a few days ahead and freeze it. 

It was a good idea. 

My plan was to make a beautiful fondant cake from scratch to show off my crafty-mom skills.  The only problem is, I don't really have those. 

First, I made the cake.  I forgot to adjust the recipe to low altitude and the center fell in.  I made a double layer cake.  As you can see, the center of the top layer is perfectly even with the edges of the bottom layer.  This is the point that I knew this cake would be for Christian.

When I pulled the cake out, I realized my heavily applied Pam wasn't enough to keep the cake from clinging to the pan.  After violently shaking the pan upside down, most of it finally came out.  Hence, the huge hole you can see in this picture. 

Well, I thought, I can just make the fondant and try again on the cake later. 

Another great idea. 

I decided I wanted to make buttercream fondant.  It would taste just like buttercream frosting, so I couldn't see any downside.  I mixed up all the ingredients except for the powdered sugar.  I added the powdered sugar a little at a time.  I was supposed to put 2 lbs of the sugar in, but my the time I got to about a half a pound, I figured it looked about right.  I know a lot about these things, you know.  I tried rolling it out, but it stuck to everything.  So I decided maybe I should put the remaining pound and a half of sugar in. (I now know you are supposed to roll it between two sheets of plastic) I scooped the fondant back into the bosh and added a few cups of sugar. 

After kneading that in, the fondant was so dry that it cracked every time I even looked at it.  I finally decided this would make a perfect topping to my holy cake.  Or maybe I should call it a crumb cake. 

But, something good did come from this!  I used a cookie cutter to make little letters for their (now normal frosted) cake.  I figured that would be a whole lot easier than trying to draw letters with icing. 

Because their names both have the same six letters, I just had to make two of everything, something I am pretty comfortable with.

I just hope the rest of the party plans work out a little more smoothly (no pun intended).

I also hope Christian likes dry fondant and sunken cake.